Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.

Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.

Only In Italy is a daily news column that translates & reports on funny but true news items from legitimate Italian news sources in Italy.
Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.
 
Subscribe to the OnlyInItaly.com  Newsletter:
Subscribe
   Unsubscribe
 
Home
Today's News
To the archives!
Mail a Mafia Threat!
Letter Samples
Order Stuff!
Why subscribe?
News Samples
Subscriptions
Our News Sources
People Are Talking
FAQs
Italian Resources
Customer Service
Your Privacy
 
Subscribe to the "Only In Italy" feed! Subscribe!
Add to My Yahoo!
Add to My Google
Add to My Netvibes
Digg It!
Follow the News Staff:
Facebook
 
"Only In Italy" Italian News & Humor
OnlyInItaly.com
 
 
Adriana's Italian Gourmet Cookies
CookiesFromItaly.com
 
 
Caterina Collezione: Handcrafted Italian Sterling Silver Tableware
SilverFromItaly.com
 
 
Angela's Italian Organic Oregano
OreganoFromItaly.com
 

Elegant handcrafted sterling silver tableware directly from a little silver factory in Italy. At "Caterina Collezione", you'll find over 500 rich examples of artistically designed tableware such as tea sets, platters, flatware, centerpieces, candelabras and more.

"Thank you very much for crafting a lovely silver dish for my parents' 25th anniversary. I saw it, and it is beautiful. I also appreciate the individual attention you paid to my order and your gracious customer service." Anne S. (Bayside, New York)

Take a look at our grand catalog and you'll find that perfect & unexpected wedding and anniversary gift characterized by the respect of traditional Italian artisanship! Visit the exclusive "Caterina Collezione" catalog only at SilverFromItaly.com!

 

Here comes that same new idea for Italian schools

Rome - January 30, 2015 - Students at Italian primary schools will soon be able to learn subjects in English, Italy's education minister has announced.

“From September there will be the possibility to have proper English professors who teach, working alongside the teacher, a subject in English,” the minister told the news agency.

At the moment the measure is focusing on pupils of primary school age, rather than older schoolchildren, the minister said.

“I know that it will take time,” the minister stated. “We are setting up a national model for the next generation of English teachers.”

The new selection process for teachers will also target Italian language teachers for children who are not native speakers, the minister said, reflecting Italy’s growing linguistic diversity.

 

Never fails... Every time Italy gets a new DIY government, whoever's turn it is to be the Minister of Education wipes the dust off the idea of introducing school subjects in English.

Before setting up that model, how about if we fix a few quirks we have with the Italian language?

bulletEnglish children are taught to avoid a run-on sentence and lighten sentences of unnecessary words. What insane academic committee stated it's fine to teach Italian children how to write one sentence that covers an entire page?
"The quick brown (insert 68 words) jumps over the lazy (insert another 51 words and a brief life story)."
 
bulletThis passionate love affair Italians have with the semicolon has to come to an end. It has always had a reputation of being worthless punctuation. We see enough of it in our Italian utility bills, cooking recipes and children's comic books!
 
bulletThe English are taught to write clear and to the point. It's like modern art, less is more. Why use four words when one will do fine? Italians are taught to write more like Dante. Why write about one circle of hell when you have nine? A production of Hamlet is less complicated that an Italian third grader's description of what he did for Easter vacation.

Last but not least, we'll be looking forward to the teachers' class notes in English such as the following:

bullet"Per festeggiare la sufficienza in arte Lorenzo S. spara un fumogeno dalla finestra dell’aula."
"To celebrate his passing grade in art Lorenzo S. fired a smoke bomb from the classroom window."
 
bullet"(In nord italia) L’alunno Dario L. giustifica l’assenza del 10/11/2014 per: Ha ceduto una diga in Puglia (sud italia)."
(In north Italy) “Student Dario L. justified his absence of 10/11/2014 with: A dam broke in Puglia (south Italy).
 
bullet“L’alunno Alessandro S. assente il 16/03/2008, motivo: Dovevo picchiare bene il mio cugino”
"Student Alessandro S. absent on 16/03/2008, motive: I had to give a good beating to my cousin."
 
bullet “Metà della classe è assente, l’altra metà tenta di convincermi che gli assenti non sono mai esistiti.”
"Half of the class is absent, the other half is trying to convince me that the absent never existed."

 

What would Jesus think of the free haircut & shave at the Vatican?

Vatican City - January 29, 2015 - The homeless will soon be able to use not only hot shower and toilet facilities but also a barber service in the Vatican.

Haircuts and shaves will be available to the poor and homeless free of charge on Mondays, the day on which barber shops and hairdressers in Italy are usually closed, starting on February 16 under the auspices of the Office of Papal Charities.

The service will be provided by volunteer barbers who have already donated razors, scissors, brushes a mirror and a barber's chair toward the effort.

 

God bless pope #266! A pope who's trying to bring hope. He's living the part, trying his best to reorganize that Vatican and bring some moral order to it.

It's nice to hear the so-called Office of Papal Charities are taking never seen before initiatives...but they've been mediocre so far. The holy salon service caught world attention and brought much needed publicity, but what about their other fabulous initiatives like:

bulletGiving out 400 sleeping bags to the homeless over Christmas (what happens when a Vatican employee finds a great going-out-of-business sale with a sporting goods store on Ebay),
 
bulletDistributing 300 umbrellas left by tourists in the Vatican Museums ("fanculo!", when it rains, it pours! From the holy coat check room to the holy "lost and found" to you on the street...you know, for keeping dry in your sleeping bag when it rains).

On a happy note, the Vatican did warm the hearts of many Catholics and non with the salon service, which, by the way, is paid for by donations...and the sale of papal blessings (6 to 30 Euros each).

We know what you're thinking, "Oh, cazzarola, I have to get a blessing from the Pope and announce it to everyone!"

Slow down...there's no blessing involved. A blessing is just a holy word for personalized lettered scrolls on parchment, marking milestones like baptisms or marriages. Most of it is computer generated and include a photograph of the pope, flower designs, sketches of Rome churches and script lettering. The closest it comes to being considered blessed by the Pope is if he happens to be within a 500 meter radius of the closet where the parchment is stored.

And regarding those volunteer barbers who you'll be seeing at the Vatican, rest assured they're super fans of Christ.

The ones with a huge picture of the Blessed Mother in their barber shops...hanging over the jar with the combs in the holy blue water.

 

Dolce per la Festa! This gift of great Sicilian taste is sure to please. Our cookie tray is filled with a scrumptious assortment of our best selling Italian and Sicilian cookies arranged on a golden cookie tray (Santo Trio Almond, Sicilian Orange Almond, Pistachio, Amarena, Buccellati and Sesame Seed Cookies). No preservatives, additives, artificial colors, or flavors.

"My mouth is already watering... Last time, I was bringing some to party, but due to weather, it was rescheduled for a month later... I froze the cookies and took them out the day of the party. The cookies never made to dessert time... Everyone kept sneaking into the kitchen to steal them and by the time dinner was over...no more cookies! Thanks for making such a great product." Michele N. (Howell, New Jersey)

Come visit the bakery at CookiesFromItaly.com!

 

4 reasons why half of Italians want to get the hell out of Italy

Rome - January 30, 2015 - Nearly half of Italians would like to leave the country and live abroad, according to a recent poll.

This marked an increase of 8% from 2006, two years before the global economic crisis hit the country, said the Eurispes polling agency.

It also found that almost half of Italians, 47%, say they can't make it financially to the end of the month. This was 16.4% up on last year, Eurispes said.

Four out of ten Italians think the Italian economy would do better if the country left the eurozone.

The percentage of Italians that want out of the euro jumped from 26% at the beginning of 2014 to 40% this month, said Eurispes.

The poll also showed that nearly half of Italians are paying medical bills on installment plans, part of a growing trend for all kinds of spending.

 

We've had it this time. Seriously. "Andate tutti a 'fanculo!"

After years of relentless recession Italians are fed up with the country, Europe, the Euro (our expensive whore currency), the Mafia, institutions, corruption, post office, alley cats...you name it! Anything with the prefix Italian attached to it.

1) We're no longer pro-European. We had greater trust in EU institutions than in our own, which have long been taken over by the rancid cheese type smell of corruption and an out of control 2 trillion Euro debt. How did it get that high?

bulletOh, the "figli di puttane" in all the past Italian governments played it real smart. They sent a gigantic supply of social studies, science, Latin language and religion books to the schools so that Italians wouldn't study math!
bulletIf Italians knew just basic accounting the first words out of their mouths would be, "Oh, cazzo, what the hell is this!?"

2) Most of Italy’s natural flora and fauna is gone due to centuries of cultivation. And most of our natural wildlife has also disappeared due to another race of "figli di puttane" who have to over-hunt.

bulletWe take our lives into our hands during the olive picking season. At any given moment when you're up in the trees picking, you could hear shotgun pellets fly over your head.
bulletOr when they shoot an old rooster in your backyard because they swore it looked just like a wild pheasant.

3) We suffer more earthquakes than any other Europeans and Californians. Unfortunately, it's a supernatural force that has brought mass destruction in Italy's past...but won't change the way of thinking and reasoning of some Italians. For example, when you're in the kitchen and hear the monotone voice of a relative asking incoherent questions:

bullet"Franco, when you built this table...how long did you make it and what kind of wood is it?"
bullet"That herd of sheep over there...is it going to graze on that land or on that other land?"

4) Our birthrate is the second lowest in the Western world. Political leaders and the Church have expressed concern and have offered cash bonuses to push us to have more than one child.

bulletBut it has nothing to do with either post-war economic booms or the current recession. The birthrate drop has been a part of Italian life for over 40 years. The truth is (and we're the only ones to admit it) Italians are getting sick of...other Italians.
bulletCan't you see we've long stopped believing in the future and in life in Italy? Better a slow extinction than to hear an Italian couple with a newborn insist, "The bishop must bless our offspring with more emotion. Giuseppe will grow up to be a man of destiny!"

 

Julian - Julius Caesar's cousin
 
 
Subscribe today to the best Italian news ezine in the history of the Roman Empire, pizza, and electricity.
Fill in the form to subscribe to the newsletter:
Your E-mail address:
Subscribe Unsubscribe
 
   Send this to a friend!
 
"Only In Italy" Archives
"Only In Italy" Archives
February 2015
Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
8 9 10 11 12 13 14
15 16 17 18 19 20 21
22 23 24 25 26 27 28
 
January 2015
Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa
        1 2 3
4 5 6 7 8 9 10
11 12 13 14 15 16 17
18 19 20 21 22 23 24
25 26 27 28 29 30 31
 
December 2014
Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa
  1 2 3 4 5 6
7 8 9 10 11 12 13
14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27
28 29 30 31      
 
November 2014
Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa
            1
2 3 4 5 6 7 8
9 10 11 12 13 14 15
16 17 18 19 20 21 22
23 24 25 26 27 28 29
30            
 
October 2014
Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa
      1 2 3 4
5 6 7 8 9 10 11
12 13 14 15 16 17 18
19 20 21 22 23 24 25
26 27 28 29 30 31  
 
September 2014
Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa
  1 2 3 4 5 6
7 8 9 10 11 12 13
14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27
28 29 30        
August 2014
July 2014
June 2014
May 2014
April 2014
March 2014
February 2014
January 2014
December 2013
November 2013
September 2013
August 2013
July 2013
June 2013
May 2013
April 2013
March 2013
February 2013
January 2013
December 2012
November 2012
October 2012
September 2012
August 2012
July 2012
June 2012
January 2012
December 2011
November 2011
October 2011
September 2011
August 2011
May 2011
April 2011
March 2011
February 2011
January 2011
December 2010
July 2010
January 2010
December 2009
October 2009
September 2009
August 2009
July 2009
May 2009
April 2009
December 2008
August 2008
May 2008
February 2008
December 2007
September 2007
July 2007
May 2007
December 2006
November 2006
October 2006
September 2006
August 2006
July 2006
June 2006
May 2006
April 2006
March 2006
February 2006
December 2005
November 2005
October 2005
September 2005
August 2005
April 2005
March 2005
January 2005
December 2004
September 2004
August 2004
July 2004
 
May not be copied, stored or redistributed without prior, written permission. "Only In Italy" is a registered trademark of FromItaly di Ciccarello.