Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.

Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.

Only In Italy is a daily news column that translates & reports on funny but true news items from legitimate Italian news sources in Italy.
Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.
 
Subscribe to the OnlyInItaly.com  Newsletter:
Subscribe
   Unsubscribe
 
Home
Today's News
To the archives!
Mail a Mafia Threat!
Letter Samples
Order Stuff!
Why subscribe?
News Samples
Subscriptions
Our News Sources
People Are Talking
FAQs
Italian Resources
Customer Service
Your Privacy
 
Subscribe to the "Only In Italy" feed! Subscribe!
Add to My Yahoo!
Add to My Google
Add to My Netvibes
Digg It!
Follow the News Staff:
Facebook
 
"Only In Italy" Italian News & Humor
OnlyInItaly.com
 
 
Adriana's Italian Gourmet Cookies
CookiesFromItaly.com
 
 
Caterina Collezione: Handcrafted Italian Sterling Silver Tableware
SilverFromItaly.com
 
 
Angela's Italian Organic Oregano
OreganoFromItaly.com
March 2010
Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa
  1 2 3 4 5 6
7 8 9 10 11 12 13
14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27
28 29 30 31      
"Italians Getting Loaded at a Younger Age"

(03/08/10)

 

The unique gift for the chef in your life who has everything in the kitchen. Angela's Italian Organic Oregano! Angela's oregano's pungent, spicy flavor makes it a perfect match for your tomato sauces, eggplant, seafood and grilled meats. One order contains 7 bags of beautifully bunched organic oregano, still on their small branches, for a total of over 195 grams (over 7 ounces).

"I love this excellent oregano. The best I have ever used! Taste, aroma, careful and attractive packaging--everything a person like me who enjoys good cooking and eating appreciates. I'm into my second order and share with only my closest loved ones! Will certainly order again." Barbara C. (LaGrange Park, Illinois)

Visit OreganoFromItaly.com and give it a try for your next Italian recipe!

"Ooooh, bella Romaaa!" Welcome to the newsletter that backs up Berlusconi's belief that the crisis will end when everyone in the world can afford a facelift. "Only In Italy!"

Your politicians (riff raffs) sound exactly like those here in America! I think your idea about the electric chair is wonderful! I see no use in thinking about moving to Sicily, it's all the same. Keep up the excellent work! Gloria B.

Ciao Gloria, e grazie! You should move to Sicily. It's fun especially if you like dancing. We love it!

Have you ever seen Sicilians square dance? Itís unbelievable! Yee-haw! 

Enjoy the issue, keep writing and Grazie!

Tanti Saluti,             
"Only In Italy" Staff      


Italians Getting Loaded At A Younger Age

Rome - March 3, 2010 - Young Italians have their first drink at a lower age than in any other country in the European Union, the health ministry reported Wednesday.

Italians on average consume their first alcoholic beverage by the age of 12 compared to a EU average of 14 and a half, according to the ministry's study on the nation's drinking habits based on data from 2007-2008.

"The low age at which Italians begin to drink is the distinguishing factor between patterns of underage alcohol consumption in Italy with respect to the rest of Europe," said the report.

More than 17.6% of 15-year-olds in Italy said that they drink on a regular or semi-regular basis, which the health ministry says puts them at high risk of alcohol abuse in later life. The report also signaled growing rates of binge drinking, particularly among men between 18-24.

More than one in five in this group said they engage in binge drinking at least once per year.

In past centuries, Italian children would sometimes be given wine to drink in preference to water which was often polluted. Therefore, one would assume the problem doesn't seem so bad - underage kids chugging a beer or two. "Palle", who cares? However; we now have little Italian villains who have developed alcohol-related problems.

And it's not like you're going to find compassion and cooperation from "figli di puttana" bar owners who refuse to act as alcohol monitors for youths. It would be difficult, especially when you have kids roaming around the 'piazza' wearing watches that show every hour as 'Happy Hour'.

Of course, peer pressure will complicate things. It will influence the usual boring issues like how to dress and what music to listen to but it can also have a negative influence on Italian children ages five to eight when family and teachers torment them into selecting a political party. Some Italian kids give in because they want to be liked, to fit in, or because they worry that other kids might harass them for selecting the wrong politician or party.

"Cazzo, center left? Gino, what's wrong with you?"
"Ah, we understand. You're communist...just like your mother."

"GINO IS A COMMUNIST, GINO IS A COMMUNIST!"

 

Don't Take God's Name in Vain On the Soccer Field

Rome - March 2, 2010 - Domenico "Mimmo" Di Carlo could not be said to have embellished his name on the chronicles of Italian football until, that is, last Sunday in the third minute of the second half of Chievo's 2-1 victory over Cagliari in Serie A.

It was at this moment, according to the disciplinary watchdog of the Italian football league, that the Verona club's coach "proffered a blasphemous expression" that was to make him the first victim of a zero-tolerance policy on irreverence.

Di Carlo, whose side narrowly avoided relegation last season, was banned from the touchline for a game after Sunday's outburst. The Italian federation, Federcalcio, decided last month that the time had come for disciplinary action to be taken against players and coaches heard taking God's name in vain. The president, Giancarlo Abete, declared it would "intervene with official decisions to make clear that blasphemy is within the definition of 'offensive, insulting or abusive language' in the rules that warrant sending-off".

Chievo's coach was not the only one caught out; one of his players, Michele Marcolini, was deemed to have said "God" as he left the field after a red card. After scrutiny of TV footage, however, the league judge, Gianpaolo Tosel, was convinced Marcolini had deployed "a slang expression used in Lombardy and the region around Venice with a crude reference to 'Diaz' and not 'Dio' " although no one on the pitch was called Diaz.

"Please would you be so kind as to pass the ball to your teammate? You grandissimo figlio di puttana!"

Hmmm...How did this religious transformation come about? Certainly, the credit cannot go to the divine intervention from the members of the Italian government. After all, it's a bit difficult to find chicken chasers who act as role models for Italian society. The credit goes to Italyís language police, who are proposing what linguists call "il linguaggio non offensivo" or unoffensive language.

Language manipulation is not new in Italy. The most dedicated splicers, cleansers, and purifiers of the Italian language were Fascist numbskulls lead by a bald muttonhead named Mussolini. Then with the introduction of the Italian "Codice Rocco" of 1930, vulgarity and blasphemy actually became crimes. Italians didn't stop swearing, however (that would be like going to the movies and staying in the lobby). They just made clever word substitutions:

Rather than taking Godís name in vain with a "per Dio!" they would say "per Diana!"
"Porca di quella vacca" (that damn cow) substituted for "Porca puttana" (damn whore).
"Figlio di puttana" (son of a bitch) became the "figlio di buona donna" (son of a good woman).

With that in mind, the Italian football league should make an exception of their zero-tolerance policy with Italian teams that have incompetent Spanish players named Jesus.

 

Dolce per la Festa! This gift of great Sicilian taste is sure to please. Our cookie tray is filled with a scrumptious assortment of our best selling Italian and Sicilian cookies arranged on a golden cookie tray (Santo Trio Almond, Sicilian Orange Almond, Pistachio, Amarena, Buccellati and Sesame Seed Cookies). No preservatives, additives, artificial colors, or flavors.

"My mouth is already watering... Last time, I was bringing some to party, but due to weather, it was rescheduled for a month later... I froze the cookies and took them out the day of the party. The cookies never made to dessert time... Everyone kept sneaking into the kitchen to steal them and by the time dinner was over...no more cookies! Thanks for making such a great product." Michele N. (Howell, New Jersey)

Come visit the bakery at CookiesFromItaly.com!

 

Italians Who Don't Pay Prostitutes Risk a Conviction and A Pummeling

Rome - March 3, 2010 - Clients who don't pay prostitutes are guilty of rape, Italy's highest court ruled Wednesday.

The Cassation Court, Italy's highest appeals court whose sentences set legal precedents, upheld a four-year rape conviction against a Ligurian man who skipped out of a hotel without paying for his sex bout.

"There is no doubt," the supreme court justices said, "that the man abused the women and was aware of it".

It was not consensual sex, the judges said, because the sex act was "only committed in light of the fee due". Diego S., 50, compounded his crime by getting the hotel to say he hadn't been there, the court said.

He was ordered to pay Laura S. 2,000 euros as provisional compensation with further damages to be established by a civil court. Diego S. was banned for life from any watchdog agencies and for five years from any other public position. The court did not say what his occupation was.

Prostitution is not illegal in Italy but exploiting it is.

"Prostitution is not illegal in Italy but exploiting it is." Someone please explain to me...air.

Italy is home to 70,000 prostitutes from about 60 different countries who charge an average of 30 euros and generate a turnover of about 90 million Euros a month, thanks to doing business with around nine million clients.

Here are your typical client profiles:

"Il Cornuto" (the most frequent profile):
- He simply wakes up one morning and decides it's time to cheat on his wife. He does so with a woman who is married, as this lowers the possibility of blackmail of one towards the other.
- He's a father as well as a husband.
- His wife may learn of the rat bastard's affair (in fact, she may even look for one of her own). So many husbands and wives in Italy maintain extramarital affairs for it is considered almost "normal".

"Signore Doppia Vita" (Mr. double life):
- He's not extremely young, mid 30's, possibly older, and either married or seriously involved.
- He meets a young single woman (25 - 30) who he begins to date. The son of a bitch doesn't bother mentioning to her that he's married or involved, and he may even maintain a second apartment where he takes the young woman, who sincerely believes that the he is single, and dedicated exclusively to her.

"Il Minchione Annoiato" (the annoyed peckerhead):
- He's likely over 40.
- He goes on one or two vacations every year, perhaps with the "ragazzi" (other losers), to places like Thailand where sexual tourism is inexpensive.
- The "minchione" risks bringing home a STD to his wife.

"Il Porco" (the pig):
- Typically younger (30 - 45)
- The pig attempts to conquer any pretty woman who happens to cross his path (work, restaurant, bar, funeral).
- He's the owner of a small business, a practice or professional studio, and broads who are anything less than beautiful need not apply for jobs in his office.
- He becomes delusional when he thinks that his unwelcome advances make him worthy of conquests, and he occasionally lures a woman into his trap. (Believe it or not, in Italy, sexual harassment of this kind is considered normal and rarely becomes a legal issue.

 

Julian - Julius Caesar's cousin
 
 
Subscribe today to the best Italian news ezine in the history of the Roman Empire, pizza, and electricity.
Fill in the form to subscribe to the newsletter:
Your E-mail address:
Subscribe Unsubscribe
 
   Send this to a friend!
 
"Only In Italy" Archives
"Only In Italy" Archives
 
February 2015
Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa
1 2 3 4 5 6 7
8 9 10 11 12 13 14
15 16 17 18 19 20 21
22 23 24 25 26 27 28
 
January 2015
Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa
        1 2 3
4 5 6 7 8 9 10
11 12 13 14 15 16 17
18 19 20 21 22 23 24
25 26 27 28 29 30 31
 
December 2014
Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa
  1 2 3 4 5 6
7 8 9 10 11 12 13
14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27
28 29 30 31      
 
November 2014
Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa
            1
2 3 4 5 6 7 8
9 10 11 12 13 14 15
16 17 18 19 20 21 22
23 24 25 26 27 28 29
30            
 
October 2014
Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa
      1 2 3 4
5 6 7 8 9 10 11
12 13 14 15 16 17 18
19 20 21 22 23 24 25
26 27 28 29 30 31  
 
September 2014
Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa
  1 2 3 4 5 6
7 8 9 10 11 12 13
14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26 27
28 29 30        
August 2014
July 2014
June 2014
May 2014
April 2014
March 2014
February 2014
January 2014
December 2013
November 2013
September 2013
August 2013
July 2013
June 2013
May 2013
April 2013
March 2013
February 2013
January 2013
December 2012
November 2012
October 2012
September 2012
August 2012
July 2012
June 2012
January 2012
December 2011
November 2011
October 2011
September 2011
August 2011
May 2011
April 2011
March 2011
February 2011
January 2011
December 2010
July 2010
January 2010
December 2009
October 2009
September 2009
August 2009
July 2009
May 2009
April 2009
December 2008
August 2008
May 2008
February 2008
December 2007
September 2007
July 2007
May 2007
December 2006
November 2006
October 2006
September 2006
August 2006
July 2006
June 2006
May 2006
April 2006
March 2006
February 2006
December 2005
November 2005
October 2005
September 2005
August 2005
April 2005
March 2005
January 2005
December 2004
September 2004
August 2004
July 2004
 
May not be copied, stored or redistributed without prior, written permission. "Only In Italy" is a registered trademark of FromItaly di Ciccarello.