Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.

Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.

Only In Italy is a daily news column that translates & reports on funny but true news items from legitimate Italian news sources in Italy.
Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.
 
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bulletCase: "Blows his friends off to not lose a date with an Internet Supermodel."
 
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Piazza Repubblica, 145 - Corleone 90034  -  Sicily ITALY

 

Caro Signore Del Moron,

Buon giorno! Come sta? How was your Easter?

Signore Del Moron, I am writing to you regarding numerous complaints we have received from your dear friends at the "Buca Di Beppo" restaurant.

It has come to our attention that your lack of respect towards them has turned into a real nuisance and it should be moderated drastically! Word of your crappy behavior has even reached the ears of your other fellow friends in the Seattle area and they are shocked and embarrassed! In simple words, you've become a real pain in the hole and everyone is starting to get tired of it.

From what we understand, you were supposed to attend a scheduled meeting on February 15 at 9:00 pm at "Buca di Beppos" restaurant. Supposedly, you sent word that you could not attend because you were sick but, afterwards, Signore Pantangeli spotted you with a “so-called” Internet Supermodel in the Bellevue area and at the “Rock Bottom” restaurant.

Instead of confronting your obvious and pathetic lie, Signore Del Moron, you took off in a speeding car like you were Princess Diana. Why run? I seriously don't think Signore Pantangeli had any intentions to chase down you and your Internet Superbroad.

How embarrassing! How stupid!

And by the way, what the hell is an Internet Supermodel? That's the definition of a broad who takes pictures of herself with a cheap digital camera, rents a $5-a-month web site, hires a pornographic web designer and slaps them on!

Now, Signore Del Moron, your friends are fantastic and trustworthy human beings. You should thank your lucky stars every day that you have them and that they put up with your silly crap. Obviously, you are not a true Italian who understands that friends, after the family, are the most important people in their lives and that they should never be betrayed.

We strongly advise you do the following immediately before your friends tell you and your E-Bay model to go scratch yourselves:

Stop by your favorite pastry shop and pick up a nice Italian Cassata and a few cannoli. Make sure the ricotta is fresh! You friends love the very fresh kind!

Signore Del Moron, we sincerely hope we will never have to be in the ugly position again of receiving another complaint on your gigolo behavior. Be a man and keep your priorities straight otherwise, we'll be forced to fly over and rip you another "buca"! If you don't what the word means...ask Beppo!

Thank you and Tanti Saluti da Corleone!

Don Peppino

 

 
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