Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.

Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.

Only In Italy is a daily news column that translates & reports on funny but true news items from legitimate Italian news sources in Italy.
Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.
 
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Piazza Repubblica, 145 - Corleone 90034  -  Sicily ITALY

 

Caro Calogero,

Buon giorno! Come sta?

Signore Calogero, I am writing to you regarding numerous complaints we have received from the Sicilian-American community you live in and from the Sicilian town you are originally from.

It has come to our attention that your lack of respect towards Irish-Americans has turned into a real nuisance and it should be moderated drastically! Word of your crappy behavior has even reached the ears of your fellow friends and relatives in Sicily and they are shocked and embarrassed! In simple words, you've become a real pain in the ass and everyone is starting to get tired of it.

We can't understand your behavior, Signore Calogero. There are no records anywhere stating that the Irish-Americans of your community left because they were driven out by Sicilians. What a stupid and embarrassing declaration from your part.

For centuries the Sicilians have always gotten along with all creeds and races of Europe and the rest of the world; especially the Irish. So, why have you alone decided to ruin years of friendship? Do you realize you are causing an international incident?

If any trouble arises from this, who are they going to blame? You? No! They will blame the Sicilians because we're the troublemakers thanks to you!

We've seen a photo of you and we must say you don't look like an Italian. You look like you're from the Middle East! That's another big strike against you.

You should also keep your trap shut when you're at work. It's bad enough the Irish know about your attitude, you don't have to also spread it to Japan!

Dio Santo, then we received the shocking word that your lovely wife is Irish! Does she know what you are doing to her people behind her back? Do we have to notify her in order to calm you down? Do you realize how lucky you are to have such a wonderful wife. Disgraziato!

Signore Calogero, we sincerely hope we do not receive another complaint from your friends and relatives here in Sicily because we're tired of it. We advise you to do two things: First, keep your anti Irish-American comments to yourself. And second, make sure your shoelaces are tied good every morning before you go to work. We wouldn't want you to accidentally trip, fall and be shipped out with the next load of tuna to Japan.

Thank you and Tanti Saluti da Corleone!

Don Peppino

 

 
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