Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.

Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.

Only In Italy is a daily news column that translates & reports on funny but true news items from legitimate Italian news sources in Italy.
Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.Only in Italy is a daily news column that reports funny and weird news on Italy, the mafia, Italian culture and Italian travel.
 
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bulletCase: "The ungrateful daughter-in-law."
 
Peppino's Insurance Co.
"We'll protect you...one way or another!"
Piazza Repubblica, 145 - Corleone 90034  -  Sicily ITALY

 

Dear Mrs. Jamie Fonte,

Buon giorno! How are you??

Mrs. Fonte, I am writing to you regarding complaints we have received from our dear friend, Signore Walter Fonte, your father-in-law.

It has come to our attention that your lack of respect towards him is starting to worsen. We were quite shocked and embarrassed when we heard this sad news. How could this happen to Signore Fonte of all people? He is well known here in Sicily for his sensitive nature and sunny disposition.

Regardless, he has asked us to quietly intervene.

Now, Jamie, Signore Walt is a fantastic human being and trustworthy friend of ours. You should thank your lucky stars every day that you married into his Family. The Family is the most important aspect of your life now and you should never betray it. It comes first before everything!

EVERYTHING, young lady!

Signore Fonte treats you like a princess and you are well aware of this (I wish I could say the same for the other Signore Fonte, your husband, but he's another issue that we will take up at a later time). Your duty as daughter-in-law is to now make up for tons of respect that Signore Fonte has lost in the past few months.

We are aware that Americans celebrate "Father's Day" once a year in June. This is very sad! Here in Italy, our daughters celebrate Father's Day EVERY SINGLE DAY! And that's what you should do, young lady. We strongly advise you do the following immediately before it's too late:

First, stop by his favorite pastry shop every Sunday and pick him up a nice Italian cheesecake and cannoli. Make sure they're fresh! He loves the very fresh kind.

Second, Signore Fonte likes to dress very nicely when he goes out. Does he dress like a bum when he comes to visit you? Of course not! Pick him up a nice Canali suit in dark blue. It wouldn't hurt to add matching leather shoes.

Do you realize when was the last time Signore Fonte took a vacation? Book him a nice paid vacation to Italy (particularly Sicily). We would love to see our old friend again!

Okay, Jamie, we sincerely hope that this has taught you a very valuable lesson. Give our deepest respects to Signore Fonte and we hope we never have to receive another complaint from him ever again. We look forward to spending great time again with him very soon.

Thank you and Tanti Saluti da Corleone!

Don Peppino

 

 
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