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"Buona Pasqua!" Happy Easter and welcome to another Easter issue of "Only In Italy!" Seriously, all of us at the news office and the Corleone consultants would like to wish all our faithful and blessed subscribers a very happy and healthy Easter. Treat your families well this holiday season. Make sure the lasagna is extra special and the 'baccala' is plentiful. Pick up a couple dozens of 'cannoli' and cheesecake at the local Italian pastry shop (make sure the ricotta is fresh!). Buona Pasqua! Happy Easter! Enjoy the issue, keep writing and Grazie! Tanti Saluti,
Torino - April 9, 2004 - He was on his way to the Susa Court House in Torino where a court hearing for convicted robbery was awaiting him. A young Genovese man, Salvatore Porrovecchio, 25, and two friends were on their way to the courthouse when police pulled over the auto in which Porrovecchio and his friends were traveling in for a routine check. A quick computer check resulted in the discovery that the auto driven was declared stolen on April 5 in the Liguria city. They were immediately arrested. The tools used in the robbery were also found in the auto. "Che culo!" That's a
fantastic story! It's obvious the first arrest for robbery didn't penetrate his unusually
thick cranium.
He and his friends probably got a good laugh out of this.
Before arresting them, the cops should have shoved these thick craniums into the patrol car radiator fan while it was running so that we all could have had a good laugh.
Ivrea - March 18, 2004 - A man released from prison celebrated his freedom with his friends and was arrested again for drunk driving. All on the same day! Emanuele Carrelli was finally free. After spending a long period in prison, he finally obtained his long awaited freedom. To celebrate he went into a bar with dear friends and drank heavily into the late night. Afterwards, when he got behind the wheel of his car to return home, he was pulled over by the police who noticed Carrelli's careless driving. After failing the 'breathalyzer' test, he was reaccompanied to prison. "Porca Puttana!" Don't you almost wish you could have had the opportunity to see the look on his face when he was arrested? Mussolini had a happier look on his last day than this genius. We wonder if he now understands he has trouble understanding.
Catania - April 11, 2004 - A man, frustrated by the reopening of a busy summer restaurant in front of his home, wanted to put a permanent end to the noisy business by planting a gas bomb. The plot, put into action the evening before by Vincenzo Faro, 77, of Torre Archirafi in the city of Riposto, Catania, was foiled by the unexpected arrival of a female tenant of the building where the restaurant was located. The man was arrested by the police squad of Giarre. The elderly man, who admitted to the crime, explained to investigators he could no longer withstand the noise from the restaurant that prevented him from sleeping. The day before, the owner of the restaurant which remains closed during the winter months was present preparing the summer re opening. To avoid the reopening, Faro had placed three kitchen stove gas cylinders weighing 25 kilograms each into a carriage, connected a 40 meter nylon fuse, placed the carriage in the basement of the building where ten families resided, opened the gas valves and lit the fuse with candles. The return of a young girl who resided in the building had put an abrupt end to the bombing when she discovered the carriage of cylinders and the strong odor of gas. The elderly man who noticed her arrival had ordered the girl to distance herself from the building. The frightened girl immediately called the fire department that quickly arrived at the scene and defused the bomb. "Che Palle!" I don't
understand...
What anger! What happened to the good old days when senior citizens used to just yell and
threaten to whack us over the head with canes? Now they're planting bombs.
It's amazing he didn't break his hip hauling around those 25 kg (55 lb) gas
cylinders.
What's next? What sentence can you give to the elderly criminal; less espresso and more fiber
in his diet?
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